10 lessons I learned from my Pre-K students this year

It's my first week of teacher summer, and I'm reflecting on all the lessons I've learned from my pre-kindergarten students this past school year.

I think that in some ways, 4 year olds understand life better than adults do. This past year was my first year teaching pre-kindergarten. Getting a chance to see life through their eyes taught me valuable lessons in appreciating and enjoying all the littlest moments, being true to yourself, and making life more fun.

1. Do stuff because it’s fun

(all pictures in this article have been sourced from Pinterest)

Most 3 and 4 year olds are not very good at various activities. Because how could they be, really? They’ve been on this earth for a mere four years. But they don’t care if it isn’t good. They do it because it’s fun, because they enjoy to. They have the time of their life drawing terrible drawings you would never be able to accurately guess in a game of Pictionary, singing beyond off-key and often the wrong lyrics, dancing the strangest dances and not caring if they fall down. They’re not overly concerned about other peoples’ perceptions or judgements. They’re living their lives solely for themselves. Their carefree freedom taught me to do things I enjoy just for the enjoyment, without any expectation of success. To pick up my colored pencils and just draw, not trying to recreate something I’ve seen before or accomplish an impressive final product, but just draw. Go for a run and run slowly, not trying to get a good time. Sing in the car without really trying to sound good. Just to enjoy the experience. You don’t have to be good at everything to enjoy doing it.

2. Wear what you want

It was always easy to tell which kids were given the privilege of dressing themselves in the morning, versus which kids wore pre-assigned outfits from their adults at home. I loved getting to see the awesome outfits kids would pick out for themselves. A princess dress, 5 randomly placed glitter butterfly hairclips, striped tights, rainbow ruffle socks, and glitter sneakers. Rainboots every day because they were her favorite. A pair of blue sweatpants, shark shorts over the pants, a superhero sweatshirt, 2 plastic shark tooth necklaces. His cowboy dress-up boots paired with a polo. Their outfits were obviously not curated, not trendy. Their outfits were chosen purely out of self expression, or randomness, or just out of fun. They inspired me to start wearing more of what I want, what feels good. Not overthinking it. Outfits don’t have to match perfectly, don’t have to be super trendy. They don’t always have to be all too fashionable, either. They can be simple, or mismatched. Your clothes should make you feel good, make you feel confident, make you feel like yourself.

3. Ask questions, interesting ones

My students asked an absurd amount of questions. And it was amazing. They haven’t yet been introduced to the idea of stupid questions. They don’t have any reason to feel insecure about asking questions. It’s quite simply their way of life. They ask questions and they learn. Sometimes their questions would be totally out of left field, so random. I loved it. I’d be sitting with them at the lunch table and a kid would ask “do you think Spiderman could web the entire grocery store?” The most interesting and silly conversation would ensue. “When’s the last time you cried?” “What are your 2 most favorite colors from the rainbow?” “Do you think mermaids really live in the ocean?” “Why do some trees grow way bigger than other trees?” Questions that often, adults think are too random or weird or dumb to ask. But if everyone asked the questions they wanted to ask, I’m sure our conversations would be far more interesting and engaging. Instead of just “what do you do for work?” try “have you seen any good movies lately?” Ditch “did you see it’s supposed to rain later this week?” and try “are you planning any trips?” Ask interesting questions. Lean into learning, into curiosity, and intrigue.

4. Find wonder and awe in everyday moments

Four year olds can find magic in anything. Some days it would take us double the amount of time to line up to go inside after recess because a kid would find a roly poly bug on the sidewalk so of course we all had to take turns crouching down to watch it. It was so endearing and heartwarming to watch these kids be so amazed at things I had previously glossed over. They would come into school Monday morning with such exciting news from their weekends. I saw a butterfly! My mommy made me pancakes… with chocolate chips! I got my own paints at home- and there’s purple paint! In our classroom, a simple joke (like me pretending that a pencil is super heavy) would elicit at least a few minutes of belly laughs from all of them. The same joke over and over again would consistently elicit the same response. While waiting for their parents to pick them up after school, two of my students and I happily watched two geese standing near the parking lot for an entire 10 minutes, just watching. Everything had the possibility to be the best, their favorite. The funniest, most beautiful, most amazing thing. Take time to appreciate all the little wonders of the world. If you’re always in a rush, always thinking about what’s next, you might miss all the magic.

5. Have the best days ever, be excited

“This is the best day ever” was a sentiment I heard often, and usually for the most seemingly mundane reasons. Wearing your favorite color socks? Best day ever. Dino nuggets for lunch? Beyond best day ever, and also so valid. You laughed today? Best day ever! They reminded me that wearing your favorite tee shirt and listening to a song you love is enough to make it the best day ever. And that the next day and every day after that can also be the best day ever. There’s no limit on the best days ever, and they don’t have to be defined by what we usually think of as being the best days, like weddings or vacations or birthday parties. They would get so easily and whole heartedly excited over just about anything and everything. “I’m so excited to wash my hands with the bubbly soap!” “I’m so excited to go on the swing at recess!” Even if it was something they would do just about everyday, it was still exciting. Because why shouldn’t it be? Excitement never got stale for them. I think a secret to life is being excited for it. Excited for the next sunset you get to see, excited to find a new song you like, excited for breakfast tomorrow, excited to get in your comfy cozy bed at night. It’s fun to be excited.

6. Say how you feel

For the most part, four year olds are often quite outward with their emotions. Their faces clearly show their feelings and, after learning how to do so, they’d make statements to anyone listening that they’re sad, or frustrated, or happy. They haven’t really learned to hide or mask how they’re feeling, or that they should be ashamed of any emotions. I’ve noticed how much it makes their lives easier. They’re able to process their emotions and move past them. They’re able to communicate with others and solve their problems in the moment. Other people don’t have to be emotion detectives and guess how they’re feeling, or what they want. I think that many adults are detached from their feelings, worried that saying how they feel might offend someone in some way, or insecure to openly discuss emotions. But if you don’t acknowledge or identify what’s going on, it’ll fester and turn into something much worse than it should be. I’ve been getting better at checking in with myself, identifying how I feel, and finding solutions to calm down both for myself and with other people. It’s the best way to take care of yourself. Take a minute to think about and say how you feel. It’ll help you connect with yourself and everyone around you.

7. Cheer yourself on

I often used affirmations and breathwork in my classroom. Each morning, the kids would give themselves a hug and repeat after me- I am kind, I am smart, I am brave, I can do hard things. After a few months, these affirmations became so ingrained in their little brains that I’d often hear them repeating some to themselves during the day. While working, they’d whisper “I can do hard things. I am strong” and when they’d succeed, they would smile and give themselves a thumbs up. I’ve been inspired. To whisper and write affirmations to myself, to give myself a thumbs up. To give myself a hug and take deep breaths if I’m feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or frustrated. Be your own biggest supporter, validate your own progress. It’s not self absorbed to be proud of yourself.

8. Tell, and show people you love them

If you ever want an ego boost, become a pre-k teacher. The way these kids showered me with love had me feeling like a celebrity. They have no shame in giving people compliments, telling people they love them. They have no misconceptions that affection is cringe, they’re not terrified of the possibility of rejection. Kids would meet each other in the morning and by afternoon be best friends. Pick dandelions to bring me at recess. Little random pictures presented to me as random gifts. As adults, I think we tend to overcomplicate human connection and relationships. We think that showing interest is too forward, that we have to feign a causal air of being nonchalant to protect ourselves. We think that telling your friends you love them is cringe. We think that complimenting strangers is weird, awkward. We think we need large gestures to prove our love. When really, all people want is to feel appreciated, loved, seen. Lean into human connection and simple acts of love. Not just for the reciprocation but simply because you want to tell them. The more kindness in the world, the better.

9. Use the good stuff

Have you ever had the experience of getting a really good sticker and not being able to commit to where you put it, so instead you just keep your sticker and keep it homeless forever? Little kids get a cool sticker and immediately peel off the back and stick it somewhere. Or you get a really pretty-looking candle and you don’t want to burn it? Or there’s a shirt you love that’s kind of fancy so you barely wear it because you don’t think casual activities are the right occasion and people would judge you, or you don’t want it to possibly get stained or ripped? Most four year olds don’t have that mindset. If they love something, they use it, they wear it, they appreciate it. You can wear your princess dress to your brother’s soccer game, because why wouldn’t you? They don’t waste their time wondering what other people might think, only what they think. You can use your favorite crayon all the way up because you’ll just find another favorite next. You can enjoy wearing your best shirt because if it gets grass stains on it, that’s okay. You can wash it or find another shirt you love. Four year olds don’t really understand the concept of saving something good for a special perfect moment because to them, every moment can be special and perfect. Use your good stuff, use your favorites. You always deserve it.

10. Move often

It’s difficult for four year olds to sit still. Unless I’m reading a story like I’m performing to win an Oscar, they’ll usually lose interest and start squirming. Rolling around on the carpet. Standing up to balance on one foot. Trying to do a cartwheel across the classroom. They love to move. The more I followed their lead and kept moving during the day, the more I realized how much better I felt because of it. I felt so much more energized, awake, alive. I’ve started to incorporate more movement into my days. Whether it be a walk in the morning or after dinner, dancing to a song before I get dressed, doing squats in the kitchen while waiting for my tea to brew. It makes sense, too. There’s so much research done on the positive effects of consistent movement throughout the day. Not just one workout in the morning, or one run after work. Small bouts of movement across your whole day. Even just jumping or running in place for 30 seconds will leave your brain and body feeling so much better. Move, often. Make it fun and enjoyable when you can. We aren’t meant to sit still for 10 hours a day.

---

I think the overarching lesson I’ve learned from my pre-k students was simply to not always take life so seriously. Make silly jokes, laugh at your own jokes. Dance and sing and make art just for fun. Skip and run and move your bodies to feel good. Say how you feel. Be unapologetically yourself. Express your joy openly. Any day, and every day, can be the best day ever.

Thank you so much for reading!

Love,

Rach